In 1984, Congress required every cable company in America to mail its subscribers a notice, once a year, saying what it knew about them, what it did with it, and how long it kept it. We are not a cable company. This is that notice anyway.
| Who you are, and what you personally watch | NOTHING |
| There is no server of ours to keep it on. No accounts, no sign-in, no database, and the set's own code sets no cookies. The ratings below count channels, never people. | |
| Your volume, whether you zoomed, the wall you picked with the contrast knob, and the channel you were last on | YOUR TV ONLY |
| Your browser remembers them so the set comes back the way you left it. They are never sent to us. | |
| How much you've watched | YOUR TV ONLY |
| A counter for the pledge break: minutes watched, channels changed, and when the break last ran. It decides when to ask, and it never leaves your device. | |
| Your cable bill | YOUR TV ONLY |
| A random account number, and whether you marked the bill paid. | |
| That you have used the set before | YOUR TV ONLY |
| One mark, set when you first tune to a channel, so the welcome card and the long warm-up that a new set gives you are not repeated every visit. | |
| Codes you have punched | YOUR TV ONLY |
| If you have been given a code for a channel, your browser remembers which listing it opened, so the channel is still open the next time you switch the set on. The code itself is not kept, and none of it is sent to us. | |
| Channels you skip | YOUR TV ONLY |
| PROG was switched off on 30 September 2026, so there is nothing new to remember. While it was on, your browser recorded whether it was lit, which channel numbers CH ▲▼ passed over, and that you had found its list. If your browser still holds one of those, it sits there unused, and it was never sent to us. | |
| Where you were when the set updated itself | YOUR TV ONLY |
| When a new deploy arrives the set reloads between programs and comes back on the same channel. The channel number waits in this tab only, is thrown away the moment it is read, and is never sent anywhere. Clearing this site's data in your browser erases all eight. | |
| TelemetryDeck | THE RATINGS |
| Every cable company wanted ratings; ours are how we decide what stays on the schedule and find out what's broken. We count which channels get tuned, how long the set stays on, whether it's a phone or a computer, and whether the pledge break ran or anyone opened the bill or the paper. Each visit gets a random number that is thrown away when you leave, so no visit can be tied to the one before it, or to you. TelemetryDeck stores no IP addresses, sets no cookies, and rounds every timestamp to the hour. Its servers are in the Netherlands and Germany. | |
| Cloudflare | THE WIRE |
| Delivers every page, so it sees your IP address, as any host does. It counts page loads without cookies. For the weather channel's local forecast it guesses your city from your connection; the guess is used once and not kept. | |
| YouTube, owned by Google | THE PICTURE |
| Every program plays in YouTube's own player. Whenever there's a picture on the glass, you're watching YouTube, and Google's privacy policy applies, cookies and all. Pressing INFO brings up a card naming the program and the person who posted it, with a link out; following that link takes you to YouTube. The name is read from the player already running on this page, so nothing is asked of anyone to fill the card in. | |
| Google Fonts | THE LETTERING |
| The typefaces are loaded from Google, so Google sees a request for a font. | |
| National Weather Service | THE WEATHER |
| Answers the weather channel's requests for forecasts. | |
| Amazon | THE SHOP KEY |
| Only if you press SHOP or follow a shopping link on channel 42. You leave for Amazon, and Amazon's policy applies from there. The links carry no affiliate tag, so nothing is earned from them. | |
| Stripe | THE BILL |
| Only if you pay. Stripe runs the payment page. We receive what Stripe gives any business: your name, email, billing address, card brand and last four digits, and the amount. Never your card number. | |
Payment records stay in Stripe, for taxes and refunds. They are never sold, rented, traded, or used to mail you anything. There is no mailing list. There are no ad networks and no tracking pixels.
The set has cartoons, but the bill is for grown-ups. We don't knowingly collect anything from children.
If the set ever starts noticing something new, this notice changes first.
| A question, a payment record, or a refund | WRITE US |
| A video you hold the rights to | WRITE US |
| Tell us which one. It comes off the schedule; no argument, no paperwork beyond the email. Both go to chris@ribbescobb.com. | |
← Back to the set · A pretend notice from a pretend cable company, describing a real website truthfully. RibbescobbLabs, LLC operates 80scablebox.tv.